A seaside romp

Here is the ninth of 25 stained glass window designs on the Palace Pier which AI and I are using as inspiration for some of these BrightonBeach365 daily posts - see Stained glass window 1 for background. This image features a person lounging in a green-and-white striped deckchair, positioned on a pebble beach. The figure is shown from behind, legs outstretched, with arms resting on the sides of the chair. Beside the deckchair are a blue-and-white beach ball, a yellow spade stuck upright in the ground, a black bucket, and a sandcastle. In the background, the sea appears deep blue, and above it, dramatic blue-grey clouds sweep across the sky, adding a slightly moody atmosphere.

A limerick starter

A sandcastle, flagged and grand,

Was built with much toil on the sand.

But the tide, with a smirk,

Would undo all that work

And leave wet chaos where art used to stand.

A Seaside Romp (with apologies to Jilly Cooper)

Clarissa’s deckchair had collapsed again.

‘Bloody vintage chic!’ she shouted, flinging a sunhat with all the grace of a woman three spritzers into a Tuesday. The Brighton sun was out, her ex-husband was back in town with a woman who looked like a sentient yoga mat, and someone had just tried to charge her £9.50 for hummus on toast.

She glared at the sea. It glared back.

To her left, a man lounged shirtless in a deckchair so smug it looked like it paid private school fees. He had a bucket, a spade, and calves like minor deities. She knew the type. Retired banker. Probably called Giles. Probably knew how to pitch a tent and your body confidence into chaos.

‘Nice pail,’ she muttered.

‘Inherited it,’ he replied. ‘Passed down through four generations.’

She looked him up and down. ‘You from London?’

‘God no. Tunbridge Wells. But I did a stint in Shoreditch. Gave it all up for sea air, spades, and spiritual clarity.’

Clarissa raised an eyebrow. ‘Spiritual clarity?’

He glanced at the spade between his feet. ‘Tried celibacy. Lasted a bank holiday weekend.’

A beach ball bounced over - thrown by a child named Persephone whose parents were arguing about NFT art - disturbing the moment. Clarissa and Giles were both on their feet, cheeks flushed, knees dusty, bucket and spade forgotten . . . ready for the next moment.

Later, as they lay entangled in a damp windbreak and the faint honk of chip fat and regret, Clarissa sighed.

‘Do you believe in fate?’

Giles considered this. ‘Only if it brings wine.’

She smiled. ‘Fetch the bucket. I’ll go get ice and Cava.’

The tide rolled in and the fizz fizzed (for want of fireworks).