Pumping above its weight

There is an historic building, a pub, in Market Street called The Pump House. The name derives from an old timber pier with a pump house which used to pump seawater ashore to different establishments for bathing in the 18th century - for health-giving purposes. It’s a handsome building. A few hundred meters away, on the beach itself, can be found the rather less sophisticated Pump Room, presumably once named after the same antiquated business practice. 

But it’s not just the Pump Room, it’s The World Famous Pump Room - even on Google. As I snapped this photograph I wondered whether this was true, so I asked Perplexity. Ever respectful and polite, it answered: ‘While the cafe refers to itself as ‘world famous,’ this designation appears to be more of a branding choice than a reflection of widespread international recognition. There is limited evidence to suggest that the cafe is renowned on a global scale. However, it is well-regarded locally, with patrons praising its prime location, quality offerings, and friendly service.’

However, ‘world famous’ is not the only claim this brilliantly self-aggrandising business makes. A large signage board on the red brick wall next to the cafe promises ‘The Best Ice Cream on Brighton Beach by far!’, and it lists over 20 flavours (Coconut and Pineapple, Banana Fudge, Cappuccino Coffee, Pralines n Cream . . .). There are also several vegan flavors on offer (Apple Pie, Ginger Nut, Chocolate Oreo . . . ). And then, comes this: ‘Probably the most famous Beach Cafe in the world.’

Well, that IS a red rag to the likes of AI fact checkers.

Here is Perplexity’s list of the five most famous beach cafes:

Speedos Café, Bondi Beach ‘the most famous and Instagrammable beach café in the world according to travel magazine Big Seven Travel; Porthminster Beach Café - Cornwall, UK; La Petit Plage - St. Barths, Caribbean; Club Dauphin - Saint-Jean-Cap-Ferrat, France; Comal - Cabo San Lucas, Mexico

And here is ChatGPT’s list:

Scorpios Mykonos - Paraga Beach, Mykonos, Greece; La Guérite - Île Sainte-Marguerite, Cannes, France; Ku De Ta - Seminyak Beach, Bali, Indonesia; Nikki Beach Saint-Tropez - Saint-Tropez, France; The Rock Restaurant - Michamvi Pingwe Beach, Zanzibar

Sorry, even though we all love you Pump Room, you’re punching (pumping!) a tad above your weight.